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peaceful but w(e)ary

a mini breakthrough

Sometimes lengthy periods of suffering or awful depth of pain will widen the spectrum, heighten the peaks or deepen the troughs. Bliss is realising that there is neither a hole you've fallen in, nor is there a mountain to climb ...and it's a measure of time since either. Leaves you questioning, is this me? Am I emotionally awake? Or am I numb? It feels peaceful but I'm weary, life has been somewhat pain-free for a fortnight now. Am cautious in anticipation of what's next. As I hold onto the possibility that this could be a mini breakthrough, I'm also conscious that I'm queen of suppression, pushing all aside and ploughing through - surviving! Time will tell, for now, it's blissful. (If you ignore the double whammy of tonsillitis - twice in 2 months! - which I'm obviously doing, for good measure!). For now, I'll look to the sun - look up and expect the best!

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